"I solemnly swear I am doing your books" - Why being a trainee is like life at Hogwarts

By
Khofhid Govender
May 2, 2024
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An introduction: My love for all things Harry Potter started in about grade 2. I won a colouring competition.

The prize was the first three Harry Potter DVDs (The Philosopher's Stone, Chamber of Secrets, and, my favourite, The Prisoner of Azkaban). Little me thought it was a lame prize, not knowing that at that very moment, I would lose my muggle* status.

Well, my muggle father initially thought I was watching 'demonic' movies.

But here I am, 18 years later, escaping reality, re-watching every movie and reading the beloved books.


Continuous learning and development

In the wizarding world, characters constantly learn new spells and expand their magical knowledge, just like we do.

We, too, must keep up-to-date with the changing accounting standards and auditing practices to maintain proficiency in our field.

We must attend long trainings and be tested on it, not in the form of an OWL but through the review process.

Facing Adversity 

Our triple threat (Harry, Hermoine and Ron) always face adversity and must summon courage in the face of danger (death eaters*, even Tom Riddle* himself).

Similarly, auditors may encounter client resistance or pushback when uncovering financial discrepancies or recommending changes to internal controls.

You will always have a snitch* on every audit team. These snitches would be like house elves who serve their honourable "wizarding manager."

I'll stop here.

You won't get names out of me here (remember ethical standards?). But seriously, calling all wizarding managers: give your elves a pair of socks!

Even one sock will do.

The "Dumbledores" and "McGonagalls" of Audit

Our managers, supervisors and partners could be compared to the respected leaders of Hogwarts.

They oversee daily operations and ensure compliance with company policies, often providing valuable guidance and support to staff members.

If only they could make the boardroom ceilings light up like stars in the night sky.

And by the snap of their fingers, fill the workstations with doughnuts and cakes.

The different business units in the firm could be 4 houses

Like Hogwarts, our firm is split into four business units (Auditing, BPO, Tax and Fiduciary and Admin).

The audit team would be placed into Gryffindor by the sorting hat (also known as HR - if we get through the interviews)

We are known for our bravery (we go for stock counts where we need to use safety boots, we deal with CFOs that want to use the unforgivable curses on us, and we even have to go back to the client with revised samples sometimes (trust me that is painful)).

Most importantly, we tackle complex financial issues; technically, we are impressive.

(Although many would say we would be heir of Salazar Slytherin* because of how intense we can be)

In Harry Potter, the black-cloaked dementors* are known for draining happiness and positive emotion from their surroundings.

The only way to face dementors is through casting a patronus* charm (happy feeling).

Similarly, the audit's busy season, with its tight deadlines and multiple engagements, drains our energy.

It takes away every bit of happiness, as our weekends of multiple tequila shots to deal with the week are no longer ours to enjoy, and our happy place (patronus) would be the end of the busy season.

My two cents: Snape has the best patronus, the doe, representing his closeted love for Lilly.

It's fantastic that I made the connection between my profession and the magical world of Harry Potter as depicted in the books and movies.

Being an auditor, going through your article years can be a miserable, trying experience. Let me remind myself and you, reader:

"Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times if one only remembers to turn on the light." - J.K Rowling.

Glossary

Dementors - The English word dementor is used generically to refer to any evil or fearsome creature. The word ultimately derives from the Latin dēmens, meaning "insane".

Patronus - The Patronus is the most famous (and famously difficult) defensive charm. The aim is to produce a silvery-white guardian or protector, which takes the form of an animal. The exact form of the Patronus will not be apparent until the spell has been successfully cast

Slytherin was one of the four founders of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry along with Godric Gryffindor, Helga Hufflepuff, and Rowena Ravenclaw. He was also the namesake of Slytherin House.